A Snow Day
by Kaiyoz
Summary: REVISED!!! I messed up the first one and had to redo it so here it is hopefully better!!! It's got all my favorite X-boys just vacationing in the Mountains!!


  
Disclaimer: the X-men belong to marvel so don't sue.  
  
I made this story up after my disastrous attempt to sled.  
Bill, Bob and Ben belong to me.  
  
  


A Snow Date  


  
  
The sun was blocked from the snow topped mountains as the head of the outlaw band of mutants, the X-men, drove his troop up for a weekend of rest and relaxation. It had been a rough few months at the mansion and the PMS epidemic had rendered a boys weekend out necessary.   
  
Scott looked over his shoulder to see his team slumped quietly in sleep or boredom. The Beast, also known as Henry McCoy, was typing away on his laptop, that man never quits working, thought Scott to himself. Curled up next to McCoy was Gambit, sleeping, he never was much of a morning person, using Henri as a pillow. The young Bobby Drake was being quiet, for once; completely fascinated with a new video game Hank had made him for Christmas. In the next row, Bishop sat erect reading a magazine, surprisingly no looking like the world was going to end any second. Also like Gambit, slumped in sleep was Kurt Wagner, I'll have to tell him he drools. Next to him in the front sat Logan, brooding on God knew what. He had driven the first half and had traded Scott spots a few miles ago.  
  
Anyone need to go to the little boys room? Scott shouted over his shoulder. A universal no' is his answer. Well I gotta go so the rest of you can just stretch or something, Scott says, Logan put on snow chains I don't want to have to do it on the side of the road.  
  
Oh sure, leave me the hard job, just admit you don't know how to do it, Logan remarks.  
Fine I'll do it, Scott retaliates. This is gonna be a long weekend, he thinks.  
No worries, Iceman will save the day! I need to stretch my fingers anyway, I've been gripping this game way to long, Bobby rescues Scott from an embarrassing experience.  
  
Gambit don' care what y'all do, just shut up about it, this Cajun needs some sleep, with that the Creole snuggled back into Hank's fur.  
  
An hour and a fight with snow chains later, Remy calls from the back, Are we there yet?  
  
Scott sighs and says, Just three more miles. I know it will be here, somewhere.  
  
Didn' you lead de Donnor party? Remy asks.  
  
Well, if he did, let me out at the Next Mickey D's, Bobby comments.  
  
Since we are lost and we're men and will never ask for directions, who votes we eat Bobby first? the Canadian in the front row asks. He's the least useful in snow.   
Before any votes could come in, Bobby comments, I say we eat Remy, he'll freeze his ass off anyway.  
  
The Beast pulls kid Creole in closer and responds, No, he can make fire, you just make Popsicles. I say we eat icebox. A roaring Yes' votes the team.  
  
Okay, okay, I can see the sign we're not gonna have to eat him, Scott rebukes. A whispered yeah' comes from Bobby. They pull into a mud-covered parking lot and all the boys attempt to get on all the snow clothes and jackets without getting mud everywhere.  
  
Once your out stay out, I don't want a lecture from Jean on how to keep the car clean, Scott orders.  
  
Gambit, hating the snow, reluctantly jumps out of the car last and with the most layers on, I hate de snow, he whines. Why couldn' we go somewhere warm like a spa or hell for all Remy care, he adds.  
  
Ah it is a beautiful day for snow, my Cajun compadre, it will be good for you. Unless you don't value your health and choose to stay at home in the midst of PMS, Hank tells Remy. Gambit and Hank both shudder at the thought of staying home during that.   
Remy better get some hot cocoa out of dis and de bed t'night, he don' t'ink jus' because I'm skinny dat I should have to sleep on de floor, Remy states, his Cajun patois marking every word.  
  
Scott remarks, You can have as much hot cocoa as you want just don't cause an avalanche. I would hate to explain that to the professor. Ever since Remy's return from the future his expanded powers were out of his control and sometimes caused a mess if he was unhappy.  
  
Well people do we want to stand in the mud all day or do we want to stand in snow? Bishop comments over the heads of everyone.  
  
I like de mud, LeBeau votes.  
  
Okay people up the mountain lets get to the lodge, grab your bags, Scott orders as everyone grabs their bags to trudge through the snow towards the hotel they intend on staying at.  
  
Scott walks up to the front desk, gesturing to the people behind him, need four rooms with 2 beds in each. Under the reservation, Summers.  
  
The desk clerk identified as Bob and not looking like he can't spell more than that, comments, Sorry, your reservation was cancelled because you weren't here before noon but I can get you a room tonight.  
  
Scott groans, Great this guys an idiot and I have to sleep in the same room as these guys tonight. Fine, whatever, just get me some rooms, he replies.  
  
I've got two double rooms on the third floor, will those work? Bob asks.  
  
Look at the size of some of these guys do you think they will fit in four beds? Scott iratatedly answers. He didn't want to put up with anymore-whining just sleep and snow.  
  
Oh don't worry the beds are very big and if not there is plenty of floor space, Bob says not wanting to turn away customers and very frightened of the angry sun glassed man in front of him. Scott grabs the keys and heads to the elevator hoping to out maneuver the other men and get there first to claim his own bed.  
  
They march out onto the third floor and see their respective rooms. They walk inside the first room and opt to vote who sleeps where.  
  
I say we see who can build the biggest snowman, Iceman votes.  
  
Lets see who can make de biggest votes the Cajun bomb.  
  
No, who can name the most numbers in pi, Beast wants.  
  
What do you say O Fearless leader?   
  
I'll decide taking into account I am the leader, Scott remarks in a tone that backs up his status. Bobby shares with Kurt, Gambit with Beast and before you say anything, yes it is because you're scrawny. Logan with me and Bishop will swap places with Beast tomorrow.  
  
Well at least I get de bed t'night, Gambit sulks.  
  
Ah Scott I didn' know ya liked me that way does Jean know? Wolverine snickers.  
  
Shut up Logan. Everyone lets go explore the hill.  
  
The X-men walk out the backside of the hotel to see the play area. It seems most people are up on the real slopes and only the people with kids are here. All the boys grab a tube to slide on except the snow fearing one, Gambit. Even Bishop grabs a sled with as much dignity as he can muster to hide his excitement; he's never played in the snow.  
  
After climbing the slippery hill they slide on butts and bellies down the side of the mountain. An hour or so later they notice Gambit sitting on a bench as far as possible from the snow, quietly brooding.  
  
A plan forms between the world-famous geneticist, the ex-XSE officer, and the angry little Canadian.  
  
Hey, kid, why ain't you up there? Logan questions.  
  
I hate de snow, malice marking his words.  
  
So you've had a few bad experiences don't let that ruin your vacation, Beast puts in.  
  
While Gambit is distracted or as distracted as you can make one who can sense every movement, Bishop walks up from behind. Remy is suddenly lifted into the air by familiar arms telling him not to cause a rucass. His legs are grabbed by Logan and told to calm down they just want to have some fun.  
  
Eh ya'll better put Gambit down fore I get real angry, Remy says not wanting to be dropped or have to use his uncontrollable mutant powers.  
The three men with the reluctant Gambit walk up the hill attempting not to draw attention to themselves. Once they reach the top they put Remy down and tell him there's only one way down.  
Yeah, walking. Nope sliding, remarks Logan.  
Come on, Bishop grabs Remy around the waist and puts him on a tube, okay, shove.  
  
Gambit is pushed off the edge of the precipice, followed by Logan, Bishop and Beast.   
  
Gambit shrieks attempting to dig his heels into the snow to slow his descent   
succeeding in putting more snow in his face.  
  
all the boys hoot at the look on Remy's face as he slowly comes to a halt, only to have the others come crashing into him.  
  
That was totally a picture perfect moment, Bobby says lowering the camera completely enthralled in a fit of giggles.  
  
The men congratulate themselves before each being plowed in the face by a huge snowball, thrown by the ever-accurate Remy LeBeau.  
  
That was the shot heard round the world, resulting in the worlds most in-depth and unusual snowball fight, make that war, the world has ever seen. Less than two hours later, trenches were dug and sides were picked and what was three snow balls turned into World War III. The treaty was signed and peace was at hand but not before Gambit pegged Scott one last time.  
  
With the end of the war, the men retreated to grab some dry clothes and warm food.   
The very sore X-guys plunked down in the hotel restaurant hoping to get served before next year. The waiter walked up to take their orders.  
  
Hey, aren't you the desk clerk? Scott asks hoping not to have to deal with that idiot again.  
  
No. I'm his twin, Bill, showing off his nametag like it was a diamond.  
  
A collective groan went around the table. Most secretly wondering if they were joined at the brain and each on got half.  
  
They gave their drink orders most, wanting something hot to warm their guts, and settled down to explore the menu. Most of the guys decided that the cheeseburger Ala bacon was looking the least threatening while Scott picked the soup of the day and Logan chose something raw and carnivorous.   
  
Bill returned with their orders and only dropped iced tea all over Remy and dumped fries in Kurt's lap. They decided that to just switch plates around until they got something they vaguely liked was easier than dealing with him again.  
  
The X-boys sat around the table deciding if they want to get back on the hill or go to the movies at the multiplex down the way.  
  
Gambit say we go to de movies, mon amis, Gambit commented wanting to be far away from the snow and iced tea.  
  
Heck no, lets go build snowmen that will scare the kids off the slop tomorrow! Bobby hated sharing the slopes with snot-nosers and desperately wanted to have a big kids only rule.  
  
BOBBY, that's mean, was the collective shout.  
  
Fine, I'll do it on my own time, Bobby mutters.  
  
Well how about, we go to the movies its getting dark fast and it's starting to snow, Scott says with understandable logic.  
  
they all agree even if it was reluctant from Iceman's corner.  
  
They pay the bill and walk up to the room but not before passing through the bar. Even without Gambits Charm' power, which is quite useful on vacation; girls still stumble at the sight of him and boyfriends and husbands wish a curse on his head.  
  
The boys grab a couple of beers for some late night beer talk and head up to their room. They change into something a little more relaxed. Kurt shows up in the hall in a pair of nice slacks and long sleeve t-shirt (but of course he's wearing thermals under them). Bobby and Bishop both dress in t-shirts, jeans, and for Bishop a very heavy jacket. Logan, as always, walks in cowboy boots and flannel shirts all the way, straight cowboy. Scott walks out with a rod up his ass as usual and in clothes that let you wonder if he irons his under wear. Beast looks very comfortable with a Polo t-shirt and Tommy Jeans and of course his neural inhibitor to keep people from screaming at the sight of a large hairy man.   
  
Gambit saunters into the hall, last, with his air of complete cockiness surrounding him like a blanket. Gambit looks like he might actually match his height with his weight (always being a little to skinny for Beast's doctor side).  
  
Damn, Remy, it ain't that cold out, Bobby says attempting to stifle his laughter.  
  
Oui, it is, Remy hate de cold, Remy remarks trying to understand why people like the mountains.  
  
Well, Logan t'ink ya look like an idiot, Logan mocks Remy's accent and doing a horrible job at it. At his point every male bursts into laughter, except Remy.  
  
Don' whine to Gambit, mes amis, when ya start to freeze your tushes off, Gambit retaliates making sure every one knows how much he hates the snow.   
  
Lets move, peoples the movie starts in a half an hour, Scott commands when the laughter dies down.  
  
The X-van rolls down the road with some of the most powerful mutants in the world being yelled at to put their seatbelts on and to turn on neural inhibitors. They put their car in the parking lot that matches the size of the town.  
  
The boys clamber out of the van to enjoy a long movie with blood and gore. Scott had been begging Jean to see this movie but she had wanted to see a movie with a pathetically unreal ending with the girl living and happily-ever-after. Two hours later, three nukes dropped and two comets crashing into a fake Earth later, having consumed copious amounts of soda the boys made a mad dash for the bathroom. After relieving nature's call, the boys decided to head back for some serious shuteye to build energy for the inevitable snowball fight tomorrow.  
  
Arriving back to the hotel the males took showers and curled into bed.  
  
Hank, if Remy wake up covered in blue fur, yur gonna be bald, Remy mutters climbing in next to Henri, oddly liking the large amount of body heat he gave off. After a quick tussle between Logan and Scott on the sides of the bed, they settle in for some sleep.   
  
Remy opens reluctant eyes to the sound of the worst singing he has ever heard and the shower running. Growing up in New Orleans, where everyone thinks they are a singer he would know. He grabs the clock and a cheery, neon green, 11:17 am flashes at him.  
  
Remy grabs a boot and tosses it at the bathroom door, Shaddup, ya sound like a dying goose, he shouts at the door. A muttered agreement goes around the room.  
  
You people just have no taste is all, comes from the bathroom with the shut off of the water.  
  
an ugly team leader with hair going everywhere stumbles into the room. Wiping sleep off his face, he shouts, Okay, everyone up. Gambit's other boot comes flying at him.  
  
Ya can shaddup too, mutters the sleeping Gambit turning over to curl back into the sheets. Another unison of agreement goes around.  
  
Fine but Bishop, Logan, Bobby and I are going to grab some grub, you guys sleep as long as you want, Scott remarks over his shoulder, already leaving. No response.  
The said men walked down ignoring the hotel restaurant, not wanting to deal with Bill, and out the front door to a diner across the road. They are seated and give their respective orders.  
  
Where are the rest of the guys? Logan questions.  
  
They decided to sleep in, lazy bums, Scott comments.  
  
Well we've got to wake them up, Bobby makes sure everyone sees the smile spread across his face.  
  
What do you have in mind Drake? Bishop wants to know.  
  
Well we know how much Gambit loves snow.  
  
With that a plan hatches to wake the lazy X-men up.  
  
The X-men tromp back across the road to awaken their sleeping compatriots. Each man grabs two handfuls of snow and walk back up the stairs.  
  
When they open the door their plan backfires, the sight of the already awake X-men grubbing on room service greets them. At the sight of the snowballs the other X-men duck and grab ice cubes rapidly tossing them at the door. The other X-team backs out the door, needing a retreat, and return to their room and put their now useless snowballs into the bathtub. They walk back across the hall with a white undershirt held high, to represent truce.  
  
Ya actually t'ought ya could git de jump on us, laughs Gambit.  
  
Bobby plops down and grabs Kurt's toast.  
  
What do we want to do today, tomorrow we must go home, Scott says not wanting to go back to confusion and the hurt at home.  
  
I say we go back to play in the snow, Bobby snickers.  
  
That idea is met with a general okay and the boys suit up for another day of snow in their pants. Heading back down stairs they stop at a chorus of childlike screams coming from the hill. Being superheroes they dash outside to see some very deformed snowmen, snow women and snow children.  
  
the team shouts at the now completely laughing Iceman.  
  
I said I'd do it on my own time didn't I? Bobby sputters in between laughs.  
  
Gambit t'ouhght it was weird dat you was up so early, Gambit remarks trying to fight down a fit of giggles.  
  
The X-men walk around the many snowmen and take a picture of the one that looks a lot like Cyclops with a rod up its butt. They see two headed snowmen, alien snowmen, decapitated snowmen, and even a Shi'ar snow men, with feathers in its head.  
With the snowmen destroyed so as not to frighten any more children, they march to grab more snow tubes and head up the hill. Gambit this time decides to go voluntarily when Beast offers a piggyback ride up. They make a seven person long caterpillar to go down the hill with Bobby in lead. They start to rock their bodies to get going and slowly yet surely they drop off the edge and snow flew everywhere. They slide to a stop and head back up for another ride. After climbing the hill what feels like one hundred times, they stagger to the flat snow and a snowball is tossed.  
  
By the end of the war, two casualties lay on the benches and no man's land was a wasteland of snowballs that couldn't make it. Having Beast on your side was a great idea because he could build launching ramps, Bobby could make snowballs faster than you can throw them, Kurt could teleport to the other side and steal their snow balls before they knew he was their, and Gambit could use his charm' ability to make people not want to hit his side.  
  
After five straight hours of snow the boys decided being warm was healthier than pneumonia.   
  
Logan groaned pooping open a beer and kicking down on the couch to watch some in room movies.  
  
I don' wan' t' ever look at anod'er snowball again, Gambit comments sitting down and grabbing a beer from Logan.  
  
You must admit that was quite amusing, to watch Bishop eat snow, Beast chuckles to himself.  
  
You will pay for that Drake, maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but someday, you will pay dearly, Bishop remarks in an under tone, noting his resolve. All the boys sat down to a beer, chips and other various junk food items. They turned on the TV to decide on an in room movie rather than go watch one at the cinema. They briefly argued over their movie and the majority voted for a cop comedy, pleasing the shoot em up people and the comedy people.   
  
Bishop sat on the floor with Remy lying on his shoulder, trying to warm up again. Bobby was laughing at any inane thing to come on the television to see if he could annoy Scott into insanity that he was positive the man was close to after living with him for so long. Scott got to sit on the couch because he was leader and Wolverine got to sit on the couch because no one wanted to fight him about it. Beast was on the bed typing away while Kurt and Bobby sat on the other bed.   
  
This movie is as fake as Brittany Spears' virginity, Bobby comments, I mean who would wear that outfit to a police station, honestly.  
  
Ice cube for brains, will ya shut your pie hole, Wolverine growls angrily.  
  
Fine, fine I'm just saying that she just ran past the front door why not run out the front door.  
  
BOBBY, SHUT-UP!!!! everyone in the room yelled.  
  
The movie went on and when the credits started to roll they flipped back on to TV to search for some sport that they could agree on. The boys didn't want to deal with Bill or Bob so they called down for room service.  
  
Hello room service, said a cheery voice.  
  
Hi, we need two double cheeseburgers, a spaghetti with meatballs, three grilled cheese sandwiches with soup, and a salad. Did you get all that? Scott asked.  
  
Yes, anything to drink and what's your room number, the voice responds.  
  
Oh, three iced teas, two cokes, and two beers. We are in room 103.  
  
Okay, Ben, your server, will be up in a half an hour, and the voice hung up.  
  
An hour and several complaints later, the strangely familiar server came up the hall. A very annoyed Remy and Logan sat outside the door.   
  
'Bout time, you 30 minutes late, mon ami, wha' de hell!? Gambit shrieks at sight the sight of Ben', he was either the third brother of Bob and Bill or he was so hungry he was delirious.  
  
Hi, I'm Ben, sorry about my tardiness, my brothers tripped me and your order was destroyed, have you met them? Ben questioned.  
  
All the men groaned as he entered the room.  
  
I guess that means you have, Ben stated matter-of-factly.  
  
The food was dropped with no tip and the men quietly ate arguing which X-woman had the nicest body.  
  
Non, Rogues got de nicest bod, 110 percent of de way, Remy argued in Rogues defense. But Storm's got de nicest legs.  
  
I, for once, agree with the Creole, Beast pipes up.  
  
Jean is the hottie, so the rest of you can go soak your heads, Scott says in defense of his wife. Logan, Bishop, Bobby back me up here.  
  
Yeah, Slim's right, Wolverine growls.  
  
Bobby adds his two cents with, No. I think Betsy's the hottest, by far.  
I must concur with McCoy and LeBeau, Storm is the most beautiful, Bishop puts in.  
  
I want to sleep so everyone go into the next room, ja, the blue German comments.  
  
Okay, people get packed and we leave for home tomorrow, says Scott with his annoying air of dignity.  
  
The boys trudged to bed and packed their stuff with an unsaid wanting no to go home, not to have to fight, not to have to argue. This weekend had been fun and a nice vacation away but going home meant responsibility and facing their problems.  
  
The boys fell asleep with a hoping that all mutant human problems were solved in the morning, so that they could stay and pretend to be normal. They all knew that was too much to hope for but one could always dream.  
  
They woke in the morning and piled into the car. The X-men stopped off at Mickey D's and grabbed burgers and fries. The ride home was quite and they didn't fight much, which shows how much they didn't want to go home.  
  
They turned onto Graymalkin drive with a collective sigh and the gates opened to welcome the return if the x-men.   



End file.
